It's the little things... (Journal #16)

It's the little things that can make life so awesome. While we had the typical meltdowns this past week, it has been the little things that have made it one of Sam's best weeks in a long time.

It's the little things...like his finally letting me complete the home therapy part of his speech this week without major distractions and tantrum's. The bad part of his rigid routine's, is that once something has been done a certain way with a certain person, he doesn't let it happen. In the past, it is hard to complete tasks like the home speech work. Sam will scream and push me away any time I start to work with his picture cards or words and will say "NO words, Ratel words." (Ratel for Rachel). Or when I correct him the way Rachel (private SLP, above in pic) does in her sessions (because he understands that way best), he gets very angry and will even hit sometimes saying "oty Ratel" (only Rachel). Or he'll sometimes say "word teater!" (word teacher, Rachel), meaning only she can teach him this. Well this week he FINALLY let me and accepted his rewards for completing his task! Usually, anymore, we can't even reward with typical treats or anything, so I have figured out to actually wait until he has started a task he wants to do and then interrupt by using the "First this, then that" trick. It's the little things...that make life so great!

It's the little things...like him finding a friend to play with at the part (oh my gosh, I meant to type park, but that is how Sam would say it, how funny, how I start typing like he talks!) yesterday! We try to take him to lots of places a week where he will be forced to socialize with others and to force him to handle the loudness and business that can sometimes overwhelm him. He has not been a fan of indoor playgrounds like our towns Maple Maze or New Brighten's Eagle's Nest or any McDonalds Playplace. It usually makes me sad to watch him at these places, as he will either cling to me or stay very close and often times cover his ears. I will literally try to push him up in or encourage him to talk to someone. He will also just hang around the entrance of the gym set and just watch others going in forever.

This weekend was great though, Brent and I took the boys to Edinborough Park in Edina. It was only Sam's second time there. He went off right away and came back first with a friend before his very social, 8 1/2 year old brother. Sam was so excited. He brought his friend to us. Granted, it was a younger child, who would do and go wherever Sam told him, but we were so happy it brought tears to my eyes (if Brent wasn't a guy he would have said the same :). It's the little things...that make life so great!

It's the little things...like the fact that he is finally getting sleep and doing so much better at school. I have been reluctant in the past to post it, but yes, Sam is on meds for sleeping at night. While the "biomed/alternative med only" group will "post me" now, I am not afraid to say how much we trust our medical community. And, while others will "ooooooo, they are doing meds......", I would rather do something tested than "stuff" that has no FDA approval or doctor approval. He is functioning much better than before. While not perfect, and never will anyone be perfect, it has been great. He will focus more for us at home, perhaps the whole reason he will sit better to do the home therapy stuff, and follows us better. We all need our sleep. Now that mom is finally getting more sleep too, we are all much better for it. It's the little things in LIFE that can make it so GREAT!

Autism Podcast (Journal #15)

I have been blessed to find this great resource to those families with Autism. "Autism Podcast" is a great website that features resources, talk shows, quick tips and advice for parents. The website's creator is Michael Boll. He is dedicated to providing information about working with children on the autism spectrum. The website provides interviews and other resources. Audio content is distributed on this website and as a podcast. You don't have to have an Ipod to listen to the podcast. The link to his page is provided on the column to the right under links.

While a year ago, Brent and I thought our world was shaken with the "official" diagnosis, I will retract and say it was "shaken up" to only be sorted and sifted with blessings.

Sifted blessings:

• We have found this great community of support and resources through the Osseo School District and Sam's therapists and teachers there (LeeAnn/SLP, Jenny/Special Ed teacher, Tracy/OT, Carol/para). Incredible!
• We have met people who are in our same shoes whom we can share stories with at North Memorial Hospital Therapy. We have the best Occupational Therapist (OT) in Melody, and the best Speech and Language Therapist (SLP) in Rachel.
• We have the BEST family support ever, Grandma and Grandpa C, Stacy's family, Kelly's family and many more extended family.
• An incredible church family group, Pastor EvaLyn and many, many friends.
• Our pediatrician, Dr. Kuperman and his nurse and the Partners in Pediatrics staff
• And last, "the Autism Web Ring" of which is a blessing to be a part of. That is also how I discovered "AutismPodcast.org".

Thanks to everyone for your constant love and support!

Sometimes he forgets, but he ALWAYS knows :) (Journal # 14)

I have noticed, over the last couple months, that Sam is forgetting bizarre things that he has always known. He doesn't always finish sentances, but he knows what he is saying, and he gives you that little cute look that pleads for a response. The other day he said to me, "I already.....outtide mom?" It would sound bizarre if you would have seen the scene :) I was rinsing some dishes at the sink when Sam came bounding up the steps yelling "I already....outtide (outside) mom?" Sometimes already means "ready" and sometimes it means "I already finished, or did that, etc..." What you didn't know, is that 30 minutes earlier, Sam asked to go outside in the snow. He had so many toys lined up in the basement, the thought of cleaning it at the end of the day exhausted me, so I told him he needed to pick up 4 things first then outside. (We have learned that he understands directions better when you say "first this, then that" type of directions.) Our district autism classes taught that to us. It really is effective with Sam. They get so focussed on what they want, that when you word it that way, he understands.

Well, after telling him to pick up four things, he quickly informed me, "No, you breat (break) my toys" meaning that would break his creation, of which he gets very upset over. I proceeded to tell him "no outside then". He stomped down the steps like a typical 4 year old. When I peeked at him a little later, he was busy arranging his toys, carefully lining them up and placing them in their perfect spots. I went back upstairs without him noticing me to finish my tasks.

Time progressed enough that I was sure he had forgotten about going outside. No sooner than I had thought that, was when I heard his little feet pound up the steps and proceeded with "I already......outtide mom?" This time he meant to say "I already cleaned up. Can I go outside now mom?"

Sometimes I wish he would complete his statements better, because I fear he is forgetting his speech, but in my heart I always know that he knows.

Another weird example, is that he forgets words he knows lately. One afternoon we were sitting at the kitchen table doing some therapy stuff together. We had a pencil and paper and were working of fine motor therapy from OT. He scrunched his face, made a fist and proceeded to slam it on the table, "MAMA!" he screamed. I said yes Sam? "MAMA!" What Sam? "What DIS talled?" he yelled as he pointed to the pencil. A pencil I told him. Immediately his face relaxed and his hand opened up and released all the tension. He smiled "Ya, pentil." "Mama, da pentil mated me mate bid, bid, bid superman buildin." (I will interpret if you missed it........the pencil made me make a big, big, big superman building.) He was so happy, but I was so sad that he forgot a simple word like pencil.

Daily he seems to forget something he already knows. Yes, he seems to be forgetting simple things, but what remains constant is that little determination and sparkle in his eye that confirms that he does know what he is talking about. He just needs time, patience and love......of which he will always have from us!